Flynns

Update on the Update on the update, on the update:

It's going to be a Terry Laybourne fish restaurant...assuming the poor fuckers sent to clean the place out survive an interior that will make Porton Down seem like and operating theatre.

Now it's shut... thank christ.

Update

I'm not getting bored with this, really. It's now back to Flynns, but thank Christ it's shut, though worryingly there is building work afoot. The cynic in me thinks that the operator might be about to scoot from Bar 38 and drag the teen scum that populates the place back along the Quayside. Whatever the plan, it will be shocking.

Update

Fuck me, it's no longer Flynns bar-diner. It's now Retro Bar Diner, a fish and chip shop that also opens when they feel like it to supply the underclass [and students on a binge] with cheap shots. A plastic shark adorns the front of the this vile dump. I'd have thought that painting it pink to reflect the cocks involved in this place might have been a more appropriate monument. However... the Quayside's newest chippy is a sure sign that it's about to sink leaving only the odd turd floating on the surface. Currently it's like Heather Mills, on its last legs !

Anyway, enjoy the review of the previous incarnation while it lasts. I can't help thinking the Newcastlepubs closed stamp will be hovering here soon.

Fresh from its weekly refurb Flynns, formerly purveyors of alcopops to the underclass is on another mission to re-invent itself. Now it's Flynns Bar Diner with, believe it or not a beer garden.

Yes that's right a ......beer garden, not a ....car park, not a....place to keep the bins. No, amazingly the side alley that used to be one of top spots on the Quayside for a knee trembler or a piss [or both at the same time in many cases] now has seats, still adjacent to the bins of course, keeping up Flynns excellent reputation for class, quality and hygine.

Amazingly a friend of mine was harassed because she stopped off for a drink in the alleged beer garden with her dog - 'you can't have dogs in the beer garden'. Now there are a few possible replies to that:

Yes you can I ve seen the customers in this place on a Saturday,
Why the fuck not, are you worried she'll catch something off the bins that are at the edge of this ?
Can't I let her have a shit first, she'll improve the tone of the place

However don't you worry pet, a quick glance at the website reveals that far from any attempt to go upmarket Flynns is staying true to its tried and tested marketing philosophy; shit customers, shit drinks, cheap prices [Fosters at a quid a pint and trebles for a quid and a half aren't likely to attract the Duke of Northumberland - at least not unless he wants some cheap sheep-dip].

The website http://www.flynnsquayside.co.uk/ is a laugh a minute. They ask, have you been shot at Flynns ? Well with their normal class of customer it can only be a matter of time. Get the paramedics on duty.

Picking the biggest shithole on the quayside is a challenge, but Flynns would be in any right thinking person's top three [along with the bog under the swing bridge].

Drink in Flynns - I'd rather clean my foreskin with a cheese grater, that would be healthier too